Is it possible to be a teacher and not feel stressed?

Louise Abslom
May 1
4 min read

Updated: 5 days ago

We all know teaching is stressful. The NEU (2025) found that only 1.5% of school staff are unaffected by stress at work. While teaching isn’t the UK’s most stressful job (police officers hold that title), teaching roles appear three times in the top ten, affecting a total of 40,000 staff.

Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t about being at the top of the Stress League Table, but it should be a wake-up call to policy makers and those involved with recruitment. Teachers aren’t leaving because they dislike teaching; they’re leaving because the stress and pressure feels constant.

I don’t need to tell teachers where stress comes from: planning, marking, behaviour management, CPD, reports, data, meetings, lack of support from leaders or co-workers, lack of resources, broken photocopiers, inconsistent IT, negative media reports — the list is endless. But for me, the most draining part these days is parental contact. A single behaviour log can prompt a rapid, confrontational response. For example, I recently recorded that a student lacked the right equipment. Within minutes, a parent challenged me on email; without even speaking to their child, they made me feel I had to justify the decision I had made. It's not a huge incident in isolation, but imagine if every time you contacted home parents challenged your professionalism; it creates stress, self doubt and exhaustion.

The worst emails I receive in my role as an Assistant Headteacher follow a familiar pattern: accusations, immediate demands, and threats to escalate (to the Head, Governors, Ofsted—even MPs - I have had them all). In early 2021, after I’d sat through countless aggressive meetings and received streams of unpleasant emails, I hit a breaking point—tight chest, sleepless nights, constant anxiety; I no longer wanted to go to work. I didn’t enter teaching for this. I had always wanted to help young people realise their potential, just as education had helped me.

At a crossroads, I chose to stay—but knew things had to be different. I couldn’t single-handedly change the education system nor the parents, so I had to look to me for a solution. Working as a job share gave me the opportunity to study for a diploma in Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapy. I thought it might help me connect differently with students and parents, but what I didn’t expect was how much it would help me, not just at work but beyond.

What I learned helped me manage my stress in healthier ways and support others in education, from trainees to headteachers. I now no longer dread those difficult parental meetings (they still happen), I still don’t enjoy them, but they don’t bring me the stress they used to.

How? By accepting that the stress starts with me and my interpretation of the situation. Many of our stress responses are subconscious, shaped by an internal dialogue we don’t even realise we’re having. That’s why one of the first things I ask the stressed teachers I work with is: "Where do you think your stress is coming from?" When we break this thought down further, the bottom line is always how they are viewing a situation. This doesn’t belittle the thought or the demands of teaching, but it does allow the teacher to step back and look at their view of the situation from a different angle.

*What happens if you let go of stressful thoughts?*

A powerful and effective strategy is to reframe how we relate to our thoughts. Start by accepting that the thought is just a thought. Imagine it like a rope being pulled by a monster—let go, and the monster (the thought) loses power. Try saying, “I am having the thought that…” to create distance between yourself and the stressful thought. This gives time to create some perspective. Mindfulness helps too — take some time to picture thoughts floating away on leaves in a stream. This helps to create distance from them and can help if you struggle with sleep too. Another strategy is to keep a Thought Diary. Noting one or two thoughts a day and assessing how true they are, helps to create distance and perspective. Both of these mindfulness strategies can be surprisingly effective, however, If you had asked the younger me to do such things, I would have said I don't have time for that, I have lessons to plan and marking to do! What I now know is that the wealth of research about the benefits of mindfulness can’t all be wrong!

These tools, though, take practice, but they’ve been transformational for me. I now see a range of issues (including difficult parents) as less of threats and more as part of a complex picture to be navigated. Ultimately, recognising that I’m in control of how I think, feel, and respond—and that’s incredibly empowering.

Louise Abslom is a qualified cognitive behavioural hypnotherapist, working online with individuals to manage anxiety, stress, low confidence, phobias and a range of other issues. She works with schools and trainee teachers to deliver stress reduction, resilience building and relaxation workshops both online and in person.